A Silly Ensugared Saturday

I was determined to not do a whole lot of nothing again this Saturday. I needed a plan to get away from the computer, and out of the apartment where the cat, uncomfortable with his bladder stone, is peeing several times daily on the (covered) futon. I picked up J, who doesn’t get out much either, and took him to the Parliament buildings in Ottawa, somewhere he’s never been. Usually Canadian gents take girls there of an evening, but J and I went in the afternoon, as we don’t have girls. We climbed around on the locks and pilings, looked at boats and stuff, and climbed up the stairs at the back of Parliament Hill. We took silly photos of us molesting the statuary. J felt there was symbolism in the fact that the cannon had a padlock hanging off the end of the barrel. After Parliament Hill, we went to “Sugar Mountain” and bought bags of candy. Then we went to the Elgin Street Diner, where I had a beef dip sandwich (and had to remind them to bring me something to dip the beef dip sandwich in) and J had a cheeseburger.

     We sat next to two scrawny girlie-girls, the boyfriend of one of which appeared to be gay. What I overheard of their conversation reminded me how much I don’t relate to girlie girls. They were all “OMG I’m going to cut my hair all off like that girl in that commercial, y’know? The one with Harvest Wheat highlights? But I HAVE to lose weight ‘cause short hair makes you look fat if you’re fat, y’know? And I’ve been eating stuff all week. I’m looking forward to the day when I say ‘Y’know what? A salad would taste really good right now’” she said as she ate her onion rings. She and her compatriot were very ordinary, not a thing wrong with their looks; so they were both trying to make something right with their looks through immaculate over styling. It was a failure. They were both completely unremarkable apart from being high maintenance and shallow. They were fancy and boring. The accoutrements were fancy, the upkeep was fancy, but the girls were themselves bland when they weren’t being annoying.

     I saw a girl with no makeup walking down the sidewalk like a newly-freed panther who these two couldn’t dream of aspiring to be like. I realize I am simply not attracted to plain girls or fancy girls. I'm also not attracted to girls who handicap their appeal to men by "cutting all their hair off" because that is to me like an amputation of glamour. I’m only attracted to plain girls who have some hint of “zing” to them, or fancy girls who have some hint of “real” to them, neither of which is very common. Fortunately there are many girls between those extremes. It’s not like there’s ever any shortage of girls who are physically interesting. The confluence of physically interesting (what I’d need in order to want to make them not platonic friends) and being worthwhile human beings with levels, complexity and brains is what is rare. Those type don’t stay single. Then we went to the Elgin Video Station, which is decorated with antique televisions, radios and movie cameras, as well as worn costumes and used props from films. J got a Jaws poster, which made him happy.

     Then we went to Future Shop, so J could waste his paycheck on stupid DVDs he’ll likely sell to the pawnshop in a week’s time. Then we came back to my place to look at the photos and funny stuff from http://www.milkandcookies.com When I was driving Jay home around midnight, a police car followed us from Almonte to Carleton Place, then pulled us over. The cop wandered up to our car, whistling, and determined that we weren’t the bad people from my street that he thought we were. Then I came back here and typed this.